SEXPO 2005 (click to see the official website)

18-20 Nov 2005
Singapore Expo Hall 4A
Adults - $14
Minors (below 21) - $8

Let's talk about sex, baby
Let's talk about you and me
Let's talk about all the good things
And the bad things that may be..

Been too busy (lazy) to blog recently.

If you are too free, make yourself busy like me.

Busy doing meaningless stuff instead of studying.

If you are really too free, read
THE CREDIT CARD PRANK

Strange things have been happening every single day for the past 3 days.

Monday:
I was shitting in the toilet and then I saw MZ! I was so stunned sia 'cos I wasn't expecting it to be her. Oh by the way, I saw MZ.. on the newspaper. Here's some pics courtesy of Straits Times Home section Page 6.





Tuesday:
I was shitting in the toilet again, in the evening. Then I heard someone playing "Tonight I celebrate my love". I suspect its coming from one of the kitchens of my block 'cos my toilet window is perpendicular to the kitchen windows. I know nowadays economy not good. But isn't it abit weird having a 'romantic' candlelight dinner in the kitchen of a HDB flat? At least go do it in the living room lah. I cannot shit and listen to lovey dovey goose-bumpling songs man.

Wednesday/Today:
I just woke up. ryN* called. She said she's going to work on Saturday. WOW! I'm so proud of you baby. Really. I'm sure everyone will be as surprised as me. Who can imagine ryN* work?? Somemore on a Saturday morning! From 730am onwards!! At Nee Soon Camp which is like so damn far from her place!!! The gods must be crazy this week I tell you. Hahahahahahaha! Oh in case you guys are wondering what she's gonna do at Nee Soon Camp.. she's gonna be giving blow jobs. To the balloons that is. Not the balooney soldiers. Blowing balloons on a Saturday morning. Who would have imagined???

Nowsadays, it has become very dangerous to speak freely online. I read the papers today and saw that someone has been charged for making fun of Christians and also other races in his blog. And the poor fella is rather young, only 17 years old, if I remember correctly 'cos I was skimming through the headlines while taking a crap in the toilet. He is the third person to be charged for speaking 'too freely' online.

So from now onwards, I'm gonna emphasise on good clean family fun on my blog. Speaking of family, two funny things happened at home today.

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We were having lunch at home in the dinning room. My sis finished her yong tau foo bee hoon first so she brought her bowl and the utensils back into the kitchen. Then she shouted for my mummy, saying that there are two rows of ants on the kitchen wall. Then she came out of the kitchen. I was rather irritated that she couldn't lift a finger (or maybe a few fingers for that matter) to do something about it. So I sorta scolded her for that.

My sis kept quiet, and after ten minutes, she came back to me. She said, "If you see a murderer, do you murder the murderer or do you call the police?" I replied saying that I'll call the police. Then she said, "Exactly. Thats why I called mummy." Bloody smart ass Rafflesian. Pui.

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Later on, I was having my teabreak. Actually not teabreak lah. It was like half an hour after lunch. I was eating mooncake. My mummy happened to be in the kitchen. So she started complaining that there are so many mooncakes at home and nobody is eating them. I was dumbfounded. I've been averaging at least 1 mooncake every 2 days and she's saying that nobody is eating them. Fine. I guess its time for me to up the tempo!

I found this damn interesting MSN conversation on the net. Here's the background knowledge you need to know before reading on.

wang - Slang for the male genetalia, specifically the penis. Syn: penis.
for example: That guy has a huge wang! (taken from www.urbandictionary.com)

Okay thats all. Here's the conversation:


<(nick has been censored)> Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the first Harry Potter Book

<(nick has been censored)> Let's see the results...

<(nick has been censored)> "Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" asked Harry.
<(nick has been censored)> "Oh, well -- I was at Hogwarts meself but I -- er -- got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me wang in half an' everything

<(nick has been censored)> A magic wang... this was what Harry had been really looking forward to.

<(nick has been censored)> "Yes, yes. I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn't a question. "You have your mother's eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first wang. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wang for charm work."
<(nick has been censored)> "Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany wang. Eleven inches. "

<(nick has been censored)> Harry took the wang. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the wang above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls

<(nick has been censored)> "Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's wang, tapped the lock, and whispered, 'Alohomora!"

<(nick has been censored)> The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's wang had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils.

<(nick has been censored)> He bent down and pulled his wang out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what looked like lumpy gray glue.

<(nick has been censored)> He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his wang, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his wang at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them.

<(nick has been censored)> "Yes," Harry said, gripping his wang very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding.... Any second now, he might hear his mother again... but he shouldn't think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn't want to... or did he?
<(nick has been censored)> Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang

<(nick has been censored)> Then, with a sigh, he raised his wang and prodded the silvery substance with its tip.

<(nick has been censored)> 'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang.

<(nick has been censored)> Ok
<(nick has been censored)> I have found, definitive proof
<(nick has been censored)> that J.K Rowling is a dirty DIRTY woman, making a fool of us all

MZ uncovered a great mystery during lecture today. A bigger mystery than why-and-how-did-one-fillipino-maid-kill-another-fillipino-maid. The lecturer said something about Chicago having a hell lot of steakhouses. In the space of a few seconds, MZ went "Oh! No wonder they are the Chicago Bulls".

Good job MZ!

Anyways, here's what I did today. Woke up, eat mooncake, go to school, come home, eat mooncake, play winning eleven 9, eat mooncake. I think I feel abit sick. But I can't control myself. I wonder if Chang-er jie jie has a lot of mooncakes up there. Since she stays on the moon, and I assume she can bake cakes.. there'll be mooncakes! Maybe I should move to the moon.

Other than mooncakes, I'm pretty hooked on cartoon network nowsadays. Its my most-watched channel after the sports channel. X-men evolution, Justice League, Teen Titans, Dexter's lab, Batman the animated series, just to name a few. I wonder if ah miao will laugh at me for being sucha kid. She laughed at me 'cos I drink Bubble Tea and eat Hello Pandy and Yan Yan.

I guess an explanation is that there's a kid in everyone of us.

As requested by 'mommy'.. wonder why she wants me to take this quiz. heh.

You're a Playful Kisser

Kissing is a huge game for you, a way to flirt and play You're the first one to suggest playing spin the bottle at a party Or you'll go for the wild kiss during a game of truth or dare And you're up for kissing any sexy stranger if the mood is right!

I really wonder. I don't think I'm like this but people around me all think so. Now even some stupid quiz thinks so too. Haha!

Your Ideal Relationship is Casual Dating

Maybe you're looking for love... But mostly you're looking for fun. You could get serious with the right person. For now, though, you're enjoying playing the field.

Some people have been complaining that I'm very vulgar.

I'm not.

Wait till you listen to this.

I was dissed by someone yesterday.

Then I went to play bball. Its been god-knows-how-long since I last played bball, I've almost forgotten the miracle effects it had on me. After 2 hours of bball, I felt like a satisfied old man. I say old 'cos I realised that I've aged. Everything has slowed down. The mind is willing but the flesh is weak. Now I truly understand how those old men, who need the blue little pill to get a hard-on and hold it up for long enough, feels.

Anyways, after the game, I was in better spirits and I concluded something. Girls will be girls. And no matter how ___fill in the blanks yourself ___ they can be, boys just can't get enough of them. Which is why girls tend to get away with things lightly. I can't imagine a scenario whereby the guy will be punished less or just as much as a girl who did the same thing. To illustrate my point, is there even caning for female criminals who commit certain crimes like their male counterparts? Have you ever witnessed public caning of girls in school (I've witnessed public caning of boys)?

Conclusion. Girls will be girls. And they get away with it, most of the time.

*maybe I should become a gay. I wonder if gays get away with things lightly too.

Always making his heart skip a beat,
'Cos she's so pretty and sweet.
Her sparkling eyes and warm smile,
Are enough to sweep him off his feet.

He said "Don't need no fancy jewelry,
to make me fall for you.
You make everything so wonderful,
Thats why I love you!"

I finally solved my laptop keypad problem. Some of the keys kept jamming. So in a fit of anger, I tore open my laptop and disconnected the keypad. Now I'm using an external keyboard. Haha.. Everyone please pray for me that the Toshiba Service Centre will change a new keypad for me for free on Monday when I bring it there.

I've concluded that I'm a very rash person. I will do whatever it takes to fix a problem. And the problem must be fixed immediately otherwise I won't be able to eat/sleep in peace.