One of my friends picked up a girl (whom he had seen on several other occassions) on the street the other day. Finally he plucked up enough courage and got her number using the excuse of making friend and networking. He smsed her immediately after getting home, but the girl replied that her bf doesn't really like the idea at all. He told me about it and the following is what my friend smsed her after that:


hey.. haha that's damn sad for me. why the drastic measures? its just widening the social circle, not taking you away.

its disappointing man.. well in any case, i cant do much. it takes 2 hands to clap and i respect ur decision and your position being a gf.

hmmm im gonna push my luck abit more.. if cant msg etc.. how abt msn? it cant be restricted to just 'see u ard'.. chances r slim for that to happen and besides, how to network liddat? come on.. cut some slack on ur bf's rules?

well i waited for now to reply.. hopefully u're alone and ur bf wun b pissed. Yup so do think abt it. very wasted to lose a fren.. btw do rem to delete my msgs. :P


I think that my friend is rather smooth. However, nothing clouds my x-ray vision. Here's my interpretation of what he truly meant (in paragraph breakdown format) :


hey.. I'm sad and disappointed. On top of that, I am desperate. How else do you explain guys picking up gals on the streets (side note: for picking up gals on buses, pls refer to Pussyjus)? Why is your bf so smart to know that I merely wanna have some fun with you and then return you back to him. And why is he so smart to take immediate drastic measures?

Well.. in any case, I can't do much unless you are willing to make things happen 'cos it takes 2 hands to clap. I respect your decision and position of being a gf, yea rite. Cmon, its not like you're married or what.

Hmmm.. I'm gonna test how stable your relationship with your bf is and to see if you really love your bf or you're loose. If can't sms, how bout msn? I'm acting like a stupid cock pretending that there's no difference between sms n msn and I hope you'll fall into this trick or maybe we can pull this trick on your bf. It can't be restricted to just 'seeing u ard' cos chances are slim, but if we can keep in touch, I'll really get to see you around. Besides, how do u network (a nicer word for flirt or sleep around) liddat? Come on, dun listen to your bf's bull crap. Let's see each other secretly behind his back or something.

Yup so do think about it. Its a waste of my efforts and plucking up my courage to say all these to you if we can't keep in touch. By the way, do remember to delete these msgs in case your bf sees them and kicks my sorry ass. I'm small and puny and I'm no fight unless I'm up against Danny DeVito.


Some people may wonder how I am able to read between every line of my fren's messages. Well, if you look back far enough into my blog, I blogged about potong jalan in my second entry. I can safely say that I know the game 'cos I've been in one. Ah, but before you immediately exclaim "So, you're also another good-for-nothing!", there is a difference between picking up a girl and trying to potong jalan, and being picked up by a girl who places you in the triangle.


Yeah I'm sure people will say that it takes two hands to clap, but for example, just ask any gal to try offering sex to a normal guy. Which normal guy will reject you? Unless of course you're born so ugly that even dogs hump your legs with their eyes closed. =P